Dear Pastor

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I’ve read your reply from a letter I had written to you and I would love some help to move forward in my life.

What I failed to mention is that my dad’s wife is a police officer and she didn’t do anything about me being molested.

My dad himself blamed me for him molesting me. My mother doesn’t know anything about the molestation and neither does his family living in St Catherine.

Growing up, my mother didn’t really tell me much about what a young girl was to do in a certain situation. I saw my mom being abused by my stepfather and I don’t know if that’s why I allowed my dad to do what he did to me.

Sometimes I sit and wonder if I’m going to be like him and do the same thing to my daughters. I kept asking myself why me. Why was I the one chosen to be molested?

He would take me on some back roads in bushes. I would refuse but I had to do it if I wanted to carry on in high school. I would be at school in my classes crying and wanting to tell a teacher but I was so scared.

How does one move on when whenever I go to visit my family in the country I see him and as big as I am, he still sends me messages asking for pictures of my privates?

I want to kill him but if I do, I would be locked away from my children. So please tell me where I can go or who I can call to get the help I need.

J.W.

Dear J.W.

Please do not blame your stepmother. She was unaware that your father was sexually molesting you so you should not hold anything against her.

If she knew and did nothing, then you would have all right to complain but she knew nothing.

Your father’s behaviour even now is despicable. He is lower than a snail. That man does not respect himself. Even at your age he is asking you for pictures of your vagina.

You should show these messages to your stepmother and ask her to get help for him. It is time for you to stop covering up this problem and your stepmother is in a position to help you.

However, it is not only your stepmother who should know about what your father has done to you. It is not too late to tell your mother about it and to let her know why you did not speak up.

I wouldn’t be surprised if he calls you a liar and you shouldn’t be surprised by that either. But if you are going to receive healing, you have to talk. You need help.

Let there be no mercy on your father. He has ruined your life. He is a bad man. Let me hear from you again.